Why Happiness Is Elusive To Many
Happiness can take several turns depending on the conditions you are in and what people consider to be happiness. Sources of happiness are numerous depending on the individual even though it is relative to your environment. You may not be happy if you don’t have a definite source of happiness. Different people enjoy different circumstances at different times. For example, a football fan can express his happiness in myriad ways when his team scores a goal. He can shout himself hoarse or may throw himself in the air with arms flying above his head as a sign of happiness. Being thrilled by the performance of his team, he can even shed tears.
Others get happy when they achieve certain goals and perhaps have beaten others to it. The joy of being top in class has always caused some individuals a lot of happiness. Others turn the tables at sporting events by grabbing top awards for exemplary performances. Think of a small baby who suddenly discovers that it can stand on its feet. Such a baby will express extreme joy at its rare achievements by yelling out inaudible words. Drugs are also known to be a source of happiness for drug addicts who find it hard to find happiness without depending on drugs. Some can never survive the loneliness and void left by a loved one who has passed on.
When you lose a loved one, it can be very sad, especially if they are emotionally attached. There are short-lived sources of happiness such as when you win in a match or watch a thrilling movie. Sources of happiness that have a short span cannot be said to be psychologically sound. True happiness should be guided by positive psychology about things and not just a state that goes away when its source is no longer thrilling. Therefore, happiness as commonly understood by the majority is simply a state brought about by certain events that strike a positive response from the inner emotions and cannot be long-lasting.
Emotional states do change and circumstances that made you happy earlier may not do so in a different setting. For instance, some couples experience total happiness in their early married life after which they may experience too much unhappiness and seek divorce. Such type of happiness is relative since it depends on the prevailing factors at the time you experience it. You may derive happiness from certain fashions which are recent in the market and later dislike them. Happiness is often recognized as the subjective well-being of a man. This is because you can only know how much happiness you have by evaluating your life with certain circumstances that may befall you.
That being said, happiness may result in a joyous mood but cannot be equated to joy. Generally speaking, happiness should be derived from contentment and not circumstances that you may experience. This is where psychology comes in, even though the Christian faith also teaches the same concept. Contentment doesn’t mean such circumstances now favor you. The conditions could be worse compared to your previous experiences at the least. Instead, you decidedly take the steps to work on your happiness irrespective of the conditions. That means happiness can be both an internal and external experience depending on the prevailing factors.
An internal feeling of fulfillment is the initial stage of attaining lasting happiness. That does not mean that you are materially or emotionally fulfilled, but the essence of self-control. You decide on what you want, but if it doesn’t happen you are fine with it. There is no point in evaluating your life with such things that come and go. Focusing your attention on the more important goal should be the primary objective. Being satisfied with what life gives is a good step towards achieving happiness. That doesn’t mean sitting back and doing nothing, instead, doing all that is required but there isn’t any good reason to torment yourself when it fails.
You can work on your happiness despite the challenges and keep unhappiness at the minimum. Just take the necessary initiative to let go of things that cause you unhappiness for your peace. When you concentrate on attaining peaceful living, such negative conditions will only drive you on to try again to attain your goal.